Actually, yes, I am super excited about a new little baby joining our family. When I was pregnant the first time, I was very apprehensive. Would I still want to graduate? Would we be able to go out and have fun? Would I even like being a mom? Would my body be shot forever? Would our lives be over forever?! Well, I am glad to say that all my fears were laid to rest when Annabel came and I realized how much I truly love being a mother. And I can still be my own person at the same time, which I think is always important.
Obviously, I think two will be a little more difficult than one... that's simple addition for 'ya... but I think I'm up for the challenge. :) Going out and having "fun" has taken on a new meaning since becoming a mother, and I find that I'm totally okay with that. I have never missed the party scene, realizing instead how empty and hollow all that is. I've made better friends since becoming a mother, with people who have similar ideals and values as our family, which is also important.
So all this is to say that I'm not apprehensive about this new child and I can throw all my energy (what little energy I have these days!) into being excited and planning for a new life. Much in the same way that I strongly believe in gentle parenting (ask me if you're curious! I LOVE to talk parenting!) I am believing more and more in gentle birth experiences. This means more or less that I am planning a less traditional-hospital-intervention-filled birth and a more hippie-inspired-home-birth-esque birth complete with a midwife, scented candles and a hot tub. All at the convenience of a hospital:) Because lets face it, postpartum nurse care and Vicodin are hard to beat!
Many people will probably question my decision, or think I'm a bit on the nutty side. That's okay. After two years of cloth-diapering, breastfeeding, co-sleeping and using only non-punitive discipline techniques, I'm pretty much used to it. I make decisions (along with Derek, of course!) that I feel are best for our family and the attachment bonds that we are constantly forming. Holly, you said it well in your latest blog that they are only this age for such a short while, and the window of opportunity to solidify this bond is so small.
I don't want anyone to think that I'm saying if you don't or haven't practiced similar techniques that your bond is any less with your children. But I guess I do have some pretty strong opinions on attachment theory and how our early relationships shape who we are as adults. (If anyone's interested, an excellent book is Robert Karen's Becoming Attached.) And maybe, maybe not, birth experience plays into this! :) I like to think so. Plus, I have a feeling that in the next 20 years or so, there's going to be some medical findings that show Pitocin and epidurals are not quite the miracle drugs that we think of today.
And that's just my two cents for the day. Call me a hippie if you want:) I'm proud to be a 21st century, well-educated, somewhat successful hippie. And this little one is due sometime early-mid June, in case you're wanting to buy us some new cloth diapers!